Dear Tulku Lobsang,

I always feel the need to impress people. I am not realy doing things to impress, but it is always on my mind.
How can I stop this way of thinking.

Kind regards
Annemiek

Response from Tulku Lobsang:

Somehow, we all want the attention of others. We always want to have influence over others. We are human and are only happy when we can change others and affect them somehow. This is why you want to impress them.
Because it makes you happy when you can change someone, affect their mind and opinions. But impressing others is not so easy. It is very complicated and expensive and requires a lot of effort. It is better to change yourself. Change yourself and then you do not need to change others. You won't need to impress others. Changing yourself so that you no longer need to impress others. The essence of impressing others is just to change them, to have an influence on them. The purpose of impressing others is to make you seem special. Wanting to become special is the biggest problem of humans. We humans have so much unnecessary stuff because we want to be special. We are too special. That is the problem! We should be normal. Being normal is what we strive for as a spiritual practitioner.

~Tulku Lobsang

Answered on July 24th, 2011
New York City, NY, USA